“Dumb as Hell”, a poem by the Bard of Murdock

It’s Sunday and today¡s poem from The Bard of Murdock tells us how one teacher dealt with her not so smart students. The poem was originally published on  Saturday, September 1, 2012. Please be sure to  read the article linked by the Bard before reading the poem.


Dumb as Hell

The students sitting for the test
Were surely not the district’s best.
They couldn’t read or write or spell.
Those darling kids were dumb as hell.
Now some may say, “Don’t let them fail.
Just grade them on a different scale.”
And that’s the way it was designed,
Before No Child Left Behind.
But now the school needs a mark
That shows an upward trending arc,
With students well above the norm
And expectations to perform!
I did not want to close our doors
Because of lousy student scores.
I’d rather help the darlings cheat
Than lose my job and hit the street.
The students sitting in the class
Were never, ever going to pass,
Without the answers to the test
Which I provided, on request.
Though caught, I do not feel remorse
For what I did, because, of course,
It never would have ended well:
Those darling kids were dumb as hell.



My Photo

My goal is to produce poetical cartoons. I try to use metaphors and caricatures (or a politician’s own words) to address complex political and social situations. In this way, I sum up current events in humorous verse.

3 thoughts on ““Dumb as Hell”, a poem by the Bard of Murdock

  1. Dumb as hell is right! Here in Florida Elementary School Children could not write a short-short story about Camels…Why…because there are no Camels in Florida ?…The assignment even started with a prompting sentence!! Worse yet…The ‘Teacher’ of many years stated [paraphrased] “Well…this would be hard for me too.” FIRE HER!

    PLU from SSF

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